Sharp talker?

Does the thought of standing up in front of a group of people leave you weak at the knees? Public speaking guru Maggie Eyre advises on how to work a crowd with natural ease Let's face it - no one really likes making speeches. Be it a wedding toast, the last words at a leaving do or an important presentation - taking to the floor and having all eyes on 'us' can be a terrifying experience. In fact, according to public speaking whizz Maggie Eyre, we apparently fear public speaking more than death itself. "Human beings are more afraid of public speaking than dying. Most people would rather be in the coffin than give the euology at the funeral," says New Zealander Maggie. Although he now strides with confidence out onto a stage, Dubai-based amateur actor Raz Ali knows only too well how nerves can get the best of people. He says he was once a nervous wreck; even just meeting new people would have him in a fluster. "I used to get pretty nervous in social situations. Simply greeting a new client at work would have me in a sweat," says Raz. "I don't know where this fear came from, but it was really frustrating and would get worse the more I focused on how anxious I was." Raz started drama classes and says that it literally changed his life. "After just three months of drama I was like a different person - more self-assured and better able to handle life and social encounters. "I think getting a grip on our fears and building confidence is really important if we want to be happy ultimately," says Raz. For those that are looking for help in the confidence and public speaking department, Maggie Eyre's new book, 'Speak In Public With Confidence', is a must read. Whether it's getting a new job, finding a partner, or getting to know colleagues better, Maggie advises on everything from body language to self belief, grooming and health and wellbeing. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF Maggie says the key to confidence is to believe in yourself by adopting a positive mindset. Apparently we have about 60,000 thoughts a day, so filtering out negative thoughts and figuring out what it is we're afraid of is very important. "Try to stop thoughts such as 'I can't do this' or 'I'm rubbish'. "When you have a negative thought, just stop and replace it with the complete opposite. 'I am calm, I am relaxed, I am worthy of this job'. So much of confidence is to do with the mind," says Maggie. Connecting with people is crucial to delivering a successful speech, whether it's at work or a wedding. "Let people in, share your stories, share what's happening in your life," Maggie says. "Being your authentic self is what people want, so let people see you. Sometimes we feel we've got to hide our vulnerability, but it's OK to be vulnerable." FIRST IMPRESSIONS COUNT Not to make anyone even more nervous, but according to Maggie, we only have three seconds to make a good impression. So that means picking at your nails, shifting your eyes to the floor or turning out in shabby clothes is not the best approach to securing a good first impression. Appearance, says Maggie, is crucial. "Dress for the job as though you already have it. Have a good night's sleep the night before a big interview or presentation and make sure you smile," says Maggie. "We have 30 muscles in our cheeks, if we smile, the person on the receiving end feels warm and welcomed. When you're going for a job interview or you're meeting someone for the first time, how do you want to be perceived? "If you're shy, fake it and smile anyway. Act like you're confident and you will be." The most important way to prepare for any speech or interview is to rehearse in your mind what you want to say, advises Maggie. "Think of the three things you want to say to get your message across and rehearse, rehearse, rehearse. "For an interview, work out all the killer questions you would dread to be asked by your potential employer. Why should they hire you, why are you different? And keep your sentences pithy and succinct, instead of a whole story." COPING WITH NERVES It's all very well knowing your material by heart, but when it comes to actually performing, many of us still suffer from nerves. Maggie, however, says that we need those butterflies in our stomach to perform at our best. "You need that energy, that rush of adrenaline to the brain, because it makes you perform larger than life." Maggie suggests learning some yoga-like breathing techniques to calm nerves and emphasises the importance of good health to boost your confidence naturally. "I'm fanatical about nutrition because I really believe you are what you eat, and you are what you speak. Make sure you have lots of vegetables and fruit and not too much sugar. "I know when I drink more water, exercise, do yoga and meditate, I perform at my best. But if I drink too much wine, I don't have enough sleep, I'm simply not focused," warns Maggie. "You need to think of yourself as an athlete and do whatever it takes." 'Speak In Public With Confidence' by Maggie Eyre is available from www.amazon.co.uk. Speak out in Dubai >> To really boost your confidence at public speaking why not jump in at the deep end by joining the Toastmasters Club in Dubai. Visit www.lagoontoastmasters.com for more information about this organisation that helps people to speak with ease. >> For a more confidential approach, Dubai-based psychologist Doctor Raymond Hamden offers help with public speaking and confidence. Contact him at the Human Relations Institute on 04 365 8498. >> Private coaching in public speaking can be found at Haldane Consulting in Dubai. For advice on how to appear relaxed, confident and in control when standing in front of any sized audience, contact 04 344 1640 or visit www.haldaneconsulting.com.

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